Becoming our Parents

‘Looking at me now, I can see my past Damn, I look just like my f***in' Dad’ – Lil Wayne

Life is not perfect, and we grow into one with flaws created by those who created us.

It’s natural to resent the people that created the world we sometimes come to hate, why did you make me do that? Why did you stop me from doing that? Why were you like that? 

It’s You that made me like this. 

They say the apple doesn’t fall from the tree. The psychology of parenting is an art that can never be perfected. 

How many of us think to ourselves when it’s me I’m never going to do what they did? Or we wish we never turn into what they were? 

But how many of us are willing to except that we have made the same mistakes? And that maybe we are the people we swore we would never be? 

It is easy to see ourselves not for what we are, and for what we do. It is easy to fall in to the trap of becoming what we say we do not want to be, because we are blinded by our resentment of our successor that we subconsciously achieve mirroring their behaviour. 

We become our worst enemy, unless we learn to forgive them for what they did that was wrong, and accept that they did so without the intention to hurt us. 

We cannot be in denial, we cannot feel superior, we must be open to accepting that we are also susceptible to mistakes and we can fail too. Our parents were as human as us, and they had parents as human as them.

 No one was brought into the perfect world, knowing how to be the perfect person.  

Live and learn, and learn to love. 

-

Our world

I’m looking at the mirror on the wall, through my rise and fall you’ve been my only friend. 

We often perceive ourselves differently to the way others do. The world through our eyes is a world that does not exist through the eyes of others. Our worlds differ. 

Yet we don’t understand the differences in the worlds we see, experience and feel. Joining two worlds to create a new one, do we notice how our flaws cause perfections in the new world? Do we see how our perfections cause flaws in the new world?

Do we see? Or are we blinded by the world we live in to notice how another’s has changed?

Are we able to empathise? Can you see from someone else’s perspective how something may appear to them? How they may feel considering the world they came from? Or are we expecting them to experience the same as us?

‘If only you could walk a mile in my shoes’ ‘If only you could see what I see’ 

If only we took the time to understand where each other comes from, and what brought us to today, would we be able to get along? Would we be able to move forward? Would we not be angry at the things that hurt us that another did not perceive to be as significant in their world as it was in yours?

Would we be at peace?

Would our worlds be at harmony? 

X

Strength

Strength is a word hard to define. It's that composure and cool someone holds when the worlds against them. It's the way you deal with a bad situation. It's how you stand up to what's holding you back. It's how you take control of yourself and what you do.

We all have our weaknesses and life is constantly testing our strength.

But it's when things get thrown at you and the weaknesses surface that the need for strength arises.

Feeling sorry for yourself and letting it overcome you only sucks you into the dark whole of pity and anguish.

It’s natural to recognise and feel the hardship of our struggles. And yes we may want to succumb to the emotions that come with that. But the time we spend indulging in our weaknesses we lose.

We should find strength in our blessings and use them to overcome our struggles. We should enjoy the life that’s left. Be strong and move on because life doesn't wait for anyone.

Inspiration

I wish it was easy to be inspired. Sometimes the world can be so uninspiring, people are conventions. Life's a routine. Everyone wants to be the same way and do the same things. No one is venturing out and away, being brave and trying to make a difference.

Well at least the majority aren't.

I want to be inspired by the way people are trying to be original and assert change in to this world.

Who are we inspiring today? Inspiration is a beauty undefined it's easy to make people think, it's not as easy to make people act.

Take a gamble

Isn't it funny that when we face a decision we sometimes resort to the flip of a coin.

Yet the outcome of the flip is almost always insignificant, it's the feeling we have when we flip the coin that matters, because in that instance our hearts tell us our true desire.

So sometimes we have to take that chance to find out what we are really wishing for.

Just Do what makes you Happy

The thing about the society we live in is that from a young age we get told what people expect from us.

It is fed into our minds that if we do not achieve past an extent we are failures. We are not worthy of good jobs, good lifestyles, nice things or happy lives. We are taught through the school system that if we dont get GCSE's or A Levels or Degree's that we have no chance at success or happinness. Careers are everything and Money is motivation.

But what I want to ask is whether that process of endless education in subject matters that torture our brains, to the point of not wanting to set foot into the classrooms or wake up that morning to see a teacher who will undoubtadly pick on you or give you another peice of work you do not want to do, is worth it?

If by the end of it you are deciding to take a subject to another level because you are told its what people want, when you dont want it yourself. Are you happy?

By the end of the long learning process will you feel happy with what you have? Will you feel motivated by happiness to go on to look for a job related to the subject you spent years hating.

Once you have the money will you feel unfullfilled and pointless?

Will your days drag on? Will you regret, and hope for a simpler life or one where you just had what you wanted and not what you were told you needed?

Not everyone will feel the same way, I'm sure there are many people who enjoy what they study,
and who will find great happinness in what they choose to do. But for that group of people who are forcing themselves to stay in a frame of work or education that they are not happy doing, is this worth it?
Is it worth being unhappy just to please society, to please the bank account, and to please everyone that told you it was the right thing when you knew it wasnt?

I'm tired of people telling me what I should want or should do, what everyone does and what is meant to happen. Why should it be? Why should I be? Why cant I be?
I just want to be happy.
If it means going against the norm and doing what feels right I will do it. The things we buy in this world will be left behind, its the memories we make, the feelings we have, the people we were that remain. The thoughts of yourself that you left with others, let that thought be one where you were happy and content with the life you Owned.

You own your life, not your teachers, family or friends. Yes their presence is important but they have their own lives to run, and their own happiness to find. So you Just Do what makes you happy.

Advice

I guess you could say the entirety of my blog is based on advice, inspiration, motivation. I want to encourage people to do something positive with their lives, to try and be someone better then they were yesterday. Or to think deeper and feel sincerely.

I like to think I offer advise to some in need.

But I am no master, I know no answers . I don't even take my own advice sometimes. I deliberate, I over think and calculate my response to life. More often then not I face a challenge and walk away simply because I am to afraid to fail it.

I don't take my own advice. And I question why you should to?

I encourage everyone to think for themselves and form their own opinion to be their own mind. That doesn't mean I am right in any way. Do not simply form an opinion based on mine, after all I don't even believe in my own thoughts at times.

But do think into your own mind and find your own beliefs, be more than who you are already and lead a life filled with advice you can give yourself. Because only you know yourself that well.
You are what you make yourself.

We live alone

We never really know the truth behind a persons smile. We never really know the depth of someone's pain. We can never truly identify the happy and the unhappy from what we see. We can never even do so from what we hear.

The world in which we live we live alone. There are things we think we know, and there is the unknown.

I don't doubt the individual pain we feel that we may not express. I commend the smiles we surface through the distresses of our day. I admire the bravery we adhere to when we chose to face our troubles alone.

I believe in the people we are and that our lives will remain unknown.

What I live, is not what you think you see. What you live is not what I think I see.

Everything happens for a reason

It's easy to dream of a world in which we achieve everything we want. It's also easy for the dream to not occur. But that doesn't mean it wasn't for the better. I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason, I guess it's partly my faith that leads me to believe that there's a bigger plan a bigger picture that actions are Fate and something's have to happen and something's just can’t happen. People walk into our lives for a reason, to serve a purpose. Love or hate them, be it a good or a bad reaction to those who come in to our focus, they're here for a reason. And we are here to learn from the presence of those around us. People come to help you through difficult times, to teach you knew things or to be an example. They may help you to learn that their way is the wrong way, but nevertheless there was a reason.

And if we do not get the things we thought we would in life it may be to let You find something better For you.

Things happen for a purpose and just live it, try to love it or at least learn from it.

The power of words

Words are a powerfull tool. Infact if I were to say otherwise it would totally contradict the relevence of my blog.

Words are intricate and adaptable, they can be used in situations to motivate and provide solace for others. We use words to express our thoughts and feelings. We use words to communicate.

But do we just use words? Or are we also acting upon them?

Words hold less of a significance when they are not backed up with actions. It is easy to say things, it is not as easy to do things.

My question is, do the meaning of your words hold the same meaning without acting upon them?
To say you care for, love or will be there for an individual, do you act upon your words? Or are they just words?
Words can be said in the moment, with the littlest effort. Actions however, prevail.
In a world of cyber connections, we intereact through words more than physical actions or presence. But how far can words take us? If we do not act upon them.

Hope is sensitive

It's hard to fight our emotional connections with situations and people. Thoughts can be prevented through distraction and procrastination but emotions are existent and merely suppressed or expressed. More often than not I find myself hoping for something although my mind tells me not to. It's hard to prevent yourself from wanting what you desire. But the hope and faith we have is sensitive to failure. It's not an expectation it’s your heart telling you what it really wants. And when what we hope for fails to occur, that is the hurt that is suffered. Whether it is the failure of achievement or the breakdown in relationships. We all hope for something and when it does not occur we feel it. Our hopes are sensitive and our hearts are very much involved.